De Profundis

Letter from G to PA (2013-3-10), page 2

But, the second opportunity, in the face of all this liminality, is to, perhaps simply or not, positively re-affirm one’s Self to oneself; examining the Self and recognizing that in spite of, perhaps in defiance of, liminality there is yet something solid remaining, a strength of purpose.

So, even knowing the daunt and din that moving would entail, since your last, I met with a lion’s roar the desperate feeling I needed to relocate. I have left behind the familiar; and did so with fervour. But, after much trial and uncertainty, I seem to finally be in relatively peaceful place, ready for … whatever Sturm und Drang it is that comes next.

I have begun reaching out to past contacts, and attempt to develop new relationships which I hope prove both reliable and firm for what is to come. Unfortunately, so many of the contacts I had established previously are no longer able or willing; or have become … unstable. When I am able to ascertain their disposition at all, those I’ve known in the past have become variously distant, simply disappeared, or, quite frankly, significantly disturbed, to put it politely. I think it takes a certain quality to undertake this work and survive with sanity intact. Or, as they say: one must quickly learn to swim, at least to tread water, or risk drowning. So far, at least to the extent that I am a trustworthy narrator of my own life experience, I appear to be have retained life and sanity (may that long continue)!

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